Got me if I even spelled that right. But, I've got it now. Thank you methotrexate, thank you immune system. Wonder what my immune system has against my body?
The coughing is driving me crazy. Three months of it now. Shortness of breath. Fatigue. The pulmunologist made me start back on steroids to get the inflammation down in my lungs. Don't think it's working.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Friday, June 22, 2012
Pneumonia, Bronchitis, and other fun stuff
I had a little annoying cough for a couple of days so I called the doc to let her know since it was getting close to the time for my IVIg treatment. She wanted me to come in and see my GP, have a chest x-ray done and hold my methotrexate until further notice...just to rule out anything. So, I did and ended up being told that I had pneumonia and bronchitis and told I couldn't go to work until further notice (stay away from people or you could catch other things). So, for the last 9 days I've been at home going crazy. I did finally get permission to go back to work on Monday. I'm not looking forward to the stack of stuff I'll have waiting for me to do. I had my IVIg yesterday and today. My CPK levels were elevated. I'm assuming that's b/c of two things...one, I had to with hold the methotrexate and two, I've been fighting off this pneumonia and bronchitiis. Also, my liver enzymes are elevated. Not sure what that means yet, but Dr. Lowery's office will call on Monday. They've been elevated before so I'm not too concerned.
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Polymyositis, CPK levels, and WBC
It's been awhile since I've written anything just b/c things have been about normal. Whatever that is when you live with Polymyositis. Every month I go in to have my lab work taken and my CPK levels are elevated. Not super, super high...but I can generally tell you they're going to be high. Then, I have my IVIg treatments and my CPK levels go back down to close to normal. Hardly ever do they actually get normal, but they're so close to it I'll count it. Then the cycle starts all over.
My doctor said something in one of our appointments, or maybe it was one of her notes that I read, that I was at baseline. That kind of made me sad really. While I've come a long way from when I was diagnosed, I'm no where near where I was (physically). I was still wishing for more improvement. I mean, in my heart I knew that after this long, I'd probably progressed as much as I'm going to and now every thing is to maintain and not get worse. Still it was hard to hear it. I mean, I still have difficulty lifting "heavy" things (heavy is a relative term here), get off balance quite often, can't walk long distances or in places that aren't level/etc...on and on. But, I can walk (most of the time), I can dress myself, I can feed myself...I guess it's all good. blah.
Doc said that my white blood count was a bit low last month. Not too worried right now. With the combination of medications I'm on may cause my WBC to drop occasionally...as long as it doesn't stay low or doesn't get too low we'll be okay. Otherwise, we have to start playing with medications...and since my polymyositis is resistant to medications, that's not something I want to do.
My doctor said something in one of our appointments, or maybe it was one of her notes that I read, that I was at baseline. That kind of made me sad really. While I've come a long way from when I was diagnosed, I'm no where near where I was (physically). I was still wishing for more improvement. I mean, in my heart I knew that after this long, I'd probably progressed as much as I'm going to and now every thing is to maintain and not get worse. Still it was hard to hear it. I mean, I still have difficulty lifting "heavy" things (heavy is a relative term here), get off balance quite often, can't walk long distances or in places that aren't level/etc...on and on. But, I can walk (most of the time), I can dress myself, I can feed myself...I guess it's all good. blah.
Doc said that my white blood count was a bit low last month. Not too worried right now. With the combination of medications I'm on may cause my WBC to drop occasionally...as long as it doesn't stay low or doesn't get too low we'll be okay. Otherwise, we have to start playing with medications...and since my polymyositis is resistant to medications, that's not something I want to do.
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Stress, Polymyositis and other stuff
What a week.
I wonder how stress affects the symptoms of Polymyositis? I was reading somewhere else where it was talking about those diagnosed with Polymyositis had some type of stressful/traumatic type of event that triggered the onset. Now, if I think back, I did have an extremely, over the top stressful month prior to becoming ill. But, as with all things, there were just as much being said about all those diagnosed without the stress as a precursor...so, it remains unknown.
What we do know, however, is that stress can trigger relapses of symptoms. So, I wasn't surprised when my CPK levels were on the high side when I had my lab work done this week. The week prior has been crazy stressful.
While my van is in the shop, I've rented a car for the weekend. Okay, so I realize I still need my conversion van, even if I'm not in the wheelchair. Getting in and out of a car is nearly impossible. I did it, with much difficulty. (But, I sure like the gas mileage better on a little car).
Mik had her first formal last night. She's growing up too fast. Before I know it she'll be moving away :(
I wonder how stress affects the symptoms of Polymyositis? I was reading somewhere else where it was talking about those diagnosed with Polymyositis had some type of stressful/traumatic type of event that triggered the onset. Now, if I think back, I did have an extremely, over the top stressful month prior to becoming ill. But, as with all things, there were just as much being said about all those diagnosed without the stress as a precursor...so, it remains unknown.
What we do know, however, is that stress can trigger relapses of symptoms. So, I wasn't surprised when my CPK levels were on the high side when I had my lab work done this week. The week prior has been crazy stressful.
While my van is in the shop, I've rented a car for the weekend. Okay, so I realize I still need my conversion van, even if I'm not in the wheelchair. Getting in and out of a car is nearly impossible. I did it, with much difficulty. (But, I sure like the gas mileage better on a little car).
Mik had her first formal last night. She's growing up too fast. Before I know it she'll be moving away :(
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Jan 2012
Welcome to 2012.
Started out the new year with IVIg treatments. Insurance approved another year of treatment. My CPK levels were slightly elevated, but not much and came down to normal right after my treatment this last week. Lab work also showed that liver enzymes are elevated. Heck if I know what that means though.
Oh, and, another good start to the new year...had to buy a new dishwasher and have mega repair done to the van today. I'm officially more than broke as of today.
Started out the new year with IVIg treatments. Insurance approved another year of treatment. My CPK levels were slightly elevated, but not much and came down to normal right after my treatment this last week. Lab work also showed that liver enzymes are elevated. Heck if I know what that means though.
Oh, and, another good start to the new year...had to buy a new dishwasher and have mega repair done to the van today. I'm officially more than broke as of today.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Merry Christmas
Christmas day is in just two days. I did 99% of my shopping online this year. The thought of walking through stores and being pushed around was a bit overwhelming. Nice to just have things delivered to the door. Now if only someone would clean the house, cook dinner...and bathe the dogs (they're filthy). Life would be almost perfect.
Dr. L. lowered my methotrexate a tiny bit due to some possible side effects. I'm not convinced it was b/c of the methotrexate, but it could have been...we shall see. My CPK numbers are close to normal, but she's determined that I can't back off of the IVIg just yet. So, we start the process of gaining insurance approval for another year. I suppose the insurance could always deny it...then, I don't know what we do. Well, she did mention the possibility of trying Cellcept again. But, since I ended up in the hospital both times I took it, I'm not optimistic on that one.
I'm still able to walk around with a cane. Around the house I practice without it, but I lose my balance a lot. Thank goodness for furniture to grab, otherwise the floor and I would get to know each other quite well. I'm determined, though, to eventually be cane free again.
Dr. L. lowered my methotrexate a tiny bit due to some possible side effects. I'm not convinced it was b/c of the methotrexate, but it could have been...we shall see. My CPK numbers are close to normal, but she's determined that I can't back off of the IVIg just yet. So, we start the process of gaining insurance approval for another year. I suppose the insurance could always deny it...then, I don't know what we do. Well, she did mention the possibility of trying Cellcept again. But, since I ended up in the hospital both times I took it, I'm not optimistic on that one.
I'm still able to walk around with a cane. Around the house I practice without it, but I lose my balance a lot. Thank goodness for furniture to grab, otherwise the floor and I would get to know each other quite well. I'm determined, though, to eventually be cane free again.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Cold, Comforters, and Polymyositis
It was cold last night. One of those nights that I've been dreading the last several years b/c since being tortured with Polymyositis, simple things, like blankets and comforters can't be used. Last year, not only did I not have the strength to pull the comforter up over my body (had to ask my daughter to help), once it was there, it felt like it was so heavy it was crushing my body...I couldn't take it.
So, anyway, last night was cold. Without really thinking about it, I reached down and pulled up the comforter. I pulled it up. And, I slept all night with the comforter over me. It didn't feel like it was crushing my entire body. Of course, I just had IVIg treatments last week...so, I'm doing fairly well this week. Maybe this will hold out for awhile. I'd forgotten (not really) how much I love to snuggle under warm blankets.
So, anyway, last night was cold. Without really thinking about it, I reached down and pulled up the comforter. I pulled it up. And, I slept all night with the comforter over me. It didn't feel like it was crushing my entire body. Of course, I just had IVIg treatments last week...so, I'm doing fairly well this week. Maybe this will hold out for awhile. I'd forgotten (not really) how much I love to snuggle under warm blankets.
Thursday, November 10, 2011
The ups and downs
I think the uncertainty of each day is one of the hardest parts of this illness. Never quite knowing when you wake in the morning how you will physically feel that day. And, of course, trying to ignore those days that are "bad days".
Last weekend was a great weekend. We were very busy doing just stuff. Saturday started out early at the American Foundation Suicide Prevention community walk here. That was probably my first "mistake"...I stood the entire time, trying to ignore the growing pain in my hips and thighs. Then, off to Walmart to do the grocery shopping and home to CLEAN, really clean, the house, cook, etc. I was so tired, but it sure felt good to have a really clean house. Sunday after church I decided that I was going to clean out the closet in the extra room...that included going through several boxes that never got unpacked after we moved (yes, 4 years ago). Boxes of pictures, wall art, etc. We had fun looking through the old pictures and I hung some things on the walls. I finally settled in on the couch around 8 PM that night. I felt productive and almost like my old life...you know, when you never sit down b/c there is so much to do.
I paid for it this week. I've been sore, fatigued, irritable, etc. Had my lab work for the month...my CPK's are high. Not too bad, but not normal...so, I'm in a mild flair. So much for backing off of the IVIg. Insurance authorization is up in January, so doctor's office is working to submit the information for the next preauthorization. I hope they don't give us any trouble over that authorization. If they force me to go through another major flair in order to prove I need the IVIg, I will not be happy.
Feeling a bit on the down side today, last few days really. I think I'm just tired of the days where I'm fatigued, no energy, and pain issues. I long for the days of running around on a whim and just living life.
Last weekend was a great weekend. We were very busy doing just stuff. Saturday started out early at the American Foundation Suicide Prevention community walk here. That was probably my first "mistake"...I stood the entire time, trying to ignore the growing pain in my hips and thighs. Then, off to Walmart to do the grocery shopping and home to CLEAN, really clean, the house, cook, etc. I was so tired, but it sure felt good to have a really clean house. Sunday after church I decided that I was going to clean out the closet in the extra room...that included going through several boxes that never got unpacked after we moved (yes, 4 years ago). Boxes of pictures, wall art, etc. We had fun looking through the old pictures and I hung some things on the walls. I finally settled in on the couch around 8 PM that night. I felt productive and almost like my old life...you know, when you never sit down b/c there is so much to do.
I paid for it this week. I've been sore, fatigued, irritable, etc. Had my lab work for the month...my CPK's are high. Not too bad, but not normal...so, I'm in a mild flair. So much for backing off of the IVIg. Insurance authorization is up in January, so doctor's office is working to submit the information for the next preauthorization. I hope they don't give us any trouble over that authorization. If they force me to go through another major flair in order to prove I need the IVIg, I will not be happy.
Feeling a bit on the down side today, last few days really. I think I'm just tired of the days where I'm fatigued, no energy, and pain issues. I long for the days of running around on a whim and just living life.
Friday, October 7, 2011
Oct. 7, 2011
Just finished two days of IVIg infusions for the month. My CPK numbers were SLIGHTLY elevated at the beginning, but came back down again. So, for November, I'm going to go in and have lab work done the day before IVIg is scheduled. That means the lab results will be in Dr. L's hands at my appointment the next morning. If my CPK levels are normal, then we will cancel IVIG for the time being. I'll continue to get lab drawn every few weeks to make sure that it doesn't climb back up. If it does, then I'll have to get right back in for another infusion.
Not sure how I really feel about it. I mean, I'm glad that my labs have looked good, but we know that the IVIg works for me. Each time we've tried to stop it, I've gone into a flare. Why can't we just keep going? Why fix something that isn't broken, you know? It's all b/c of insurance. To prove to the insurance company that I need it, I have to stop taking it and flare up. Nice. They aren't the ones that will take a few months recovering from the flare.
Not sure how I really feel about it. I mean, I'm glad that my labs have looked good, but we know that the IVIg works for me. Each time we've tried to stop it, I've gone into a flare. Why can't we just keep going? Why fix something that isn't broken, you know? It's all b/c of insurance. To prove to the insurance company that I need it, I have to stop taking it and flare up. Nice. They aren't the ones that will take a few months recovering from the flare.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Pet peeves
There are things that I've likely taken greater notice of in the last few years b/c of this Polymyositis...and some have become pet peeves of mine. They really drive me crazy.
There are not enough handicapped parking spots, esp if you need a wheelchair.
There are too many people using the parking spots that don't need them...i.e. they use someone's temporary placard to park. This takes away the parking spots from those who really do need them. I only use them when I have to, despite having a permanent tag...and, if I can park somewhere that's not labeled handicapped, but I can still get out w/a wheelchair, then I do, leaving open the others for someone who might come behind me.
Motorcycles that park illegally, blocking ramps for vans/wheelchairs. Walmart in Cabot is horrendous about this. It got better after I sent a letter/complaint to the Cabot police office, but it's started back up again.
Grass that won't mow itself. Have a feeling this is a "pet peeve" I'll have to learn to deal with.
People that tell me how great I look when I feel horrible!
Stores that have the isles of things so close together, that you can't get your wheelchair through it. It's hard enough to walk through it w/my cane.
and, so many others. Guess I need to learn to deal with things.
There are not enough handicapped parking spots, esp if you need a wheelchair.
There are too many people using the parking spots that don't need them...i.e. they use someone's temporary placard to park. This takes away the parking spots from those who really do need them. I only use them when I have to, despite having a permanent tag...and, if I can park somewhere that's not labeled handicapped, but I can still get out w/a wheelchair, then I do, leaving open the others for someone who might come behind me.
Motorcycles that park illegally, blocking ramps for vans/wheelchairs. Walmart in Cabot is horrendous about this. It got better after I sent a letter/complaint to the Cabot police office, but it's started back up again.
Grass that won't mow itself. Have a feeling this is a "pet peeve" I'll have to learn to deal with.
People that tell me how great I look when I feel horrible!
Stores that have the isles of things so close together, that you can't get your wheelchair through it. It's hard enough to walk through it w/my cane.
and, so many others. Guess I need to learn to deal with things.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Imuran Increase
So, Dr. Lowery decided to increase my Imuran instead of restarting prednisone. I'm glad about not restarting the prednisone :) Hopefully everything will be okay with the increase of Imuran.
I've been feeling a bit run down lately. I'm glad today is Friday and I don't have to go to work tomorrow. Maybe I just need to have some downtime.
I've been feeling a bit run down lately. I'm glad today is Friday and I don't have to go to work tomorrow. Maybe I just need to have some downtime.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Flare
Well, my lab results from yesterday indicated an elevated CPK level. Kinda expected that as I've been feeling the tired muscles. Doing simple things such as getting dressed felt more like marathon workouts. I'm having trouble holding a hairdryer to dry my hair.
After my two IVIg infusions, it came back down again, but it's obvious it's climbing between infusions. So, Dr. Lowery is taking the weekend to read the latest research just to see if there is anything new out there (don't think there is), then she will call me next week with options. I made many options that did not include restarting prednisone. Hm. Wonder if she'll listen to me.
This so wasn't in the plan. My plan anyway. Guess God has a different one.
After my two IVIg infusions, it came back down again, but it's obvious it's climbing between infusions. So, Dr. Lowery is taking the weekend to read the latest research just to see if there is anything new out there (don't think there is), then she will call me next week with options. I made many options that did not include restarting prednisone. Hm. Wonder if she'll listen to me.
This so wasn't in the plan. My plan anyway. Guess God has a different one.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Life without Prednisone
It has been a short while only, but I'm exhausted. Dr. Lowery said it would take some time for my adrenal glands to kick in and do their thing. Each time I lowered the dose of prednisone, I was fatigued...well, Dr. L said it was due to the tapering. I just think it's life with Polymyositis. Taking that last dose of Prednisone, though...wow. I've been more than a little tired. And nauseous. And itching all over (that's about to drive me crazy). I didn't make it to the gym to do my exercises last week...the thought of it was too overwhelming. This week, I work two days then have two days of IVIg infusions. Maybe that will help get a bit of energy back.
No loss of muscle strength that I've noticed though. That's a good thing.
No loss of muscle strength that I've noticed though. That's a good thing.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
No More Prednisone!
I'm off of the prednisone. I know there are good things about that drug. Without it many people would suffer from many things...but, there are so many bad things that come with it. So I cheerfully say farewell to the Prednisone, and hope to never have to swallow you again!
How's it going? Well, I'm unusually fatigued today. But, that's to be expected for a couple of weeks while my adrenal glands are kicking in and working on their own. They've not had to work for themselves for several years now. Time to stop being lazy and do their own work.
Maybe some of this excess weight will come off now. And the moodiness, irritability, etc.
Of course, we all continue to hope that my CPK levels will remain in the normal levels.
How's it going? Well, I'm unusually fatigued today. But, that's to be expected for a couple of weeks while my adrenal glands are kicking in and working on their own. They've not had to work for themselves for several years now. Time to stop being lazy and do their own work.
Maybe some of this excess weight will come off now. And the moodiness, irritability, etc.
Of course, we all continue to hope that my CPK levels will remain in the normal levels.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Prednisone Free - almost!
One more decrease and then I stop it all together. So, just a few more weeks and then I'm off of the prednisone. Hopefully for good. That really feels good.
IVIg this last Thursday and Friday. Labs showed CPK was at the high end of normal...but still normal. My SED rates were elevated though.
I've been feeling fairly well. I've only had one fall in the last month. My energy level...well, it starts out okay, but it drains quickly. So, I can do things in short spurts. If that makes sense. Dr. L thinks I need to increase the time I'm putting into exercise...from 3 days to 5 days a week. I do something everyday, but she wants me to do more. It'll help with losing some of this prednisone weight and, possibly, regaining strength and range of motion.
IVIg this last Thursday and Friday. Labs showed CPK was at the high end of normal...but still normal. My SED rates were elevated though.
I've been feeling fairly well. I've only had one fall in the last month. My energy level...well, it starts out okay, but it drains quickly. So, I can do things in short spurts. If that makes sense. Dr. L thinks I need to increase the time I'm putting into exercise...from 3 days to 5 days a week. I do something everyday, but she wants me to do more. It'll help with losing some of this prednisone weight and, possibly, regaining strength and range of motion.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Heat Intolerance
It's only in the 90's and I'm miserable...even in the air conditioning. I wonder what causes the heat intolerance? Is it the polymyositis? The medications? Or some other underlying condition we've yet to discover? Whatever it is...go away.
The results of my testing...evidently I'm not digesting my food quickly enough. A "normal" person digests their food (most of it) within 30ish minutes. Doc said after 6 hours I'd digested about 1/4 of my food. He says that is fairly common for people with Polymyositis. Interesting. I've never read that, but it makes sense...those muscles of mine just don't want to work properly.
IVIg next week.
The results of my testing...evidently I'm not digesting my food quickly enough. A "normal" person digests their food (most of it) within 30ish minutes. Doc said after 6 hours I'd digested about 1/4 of my food. He says that is fairly common for people with Polymyositis. Interesting. I've never read that, but it makes sense...those muscles of mine just don't want to work properly.
IVIg next week.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Progress and diet changes
My CPK levels were a tad bit high yesterday. But, not that high...so, I'm still saying we're in the normal range ;) I think that Dr. Lowery will continue to let me decrease my prednisone. Shouldn't be too much longer now and I'll be totally off of that stuff. I think I'm going to plan a celebration for the day I take the last one! There really is nothing I like about that drug.
Then, the next step...we're going to try going longer between IVIg infusions. I'm a bit worried about it just b/c I have the attitude of "don't fix something that isn't broken"...I mean, it's working, why mess with it? But, I know that insurance isn't going to keep paying for it without proof that I still need it and the only proof that they will accept is tapering me off and seeing if I become worse. So, we shall see.
I've not been able to make it to the gym much in the last two weeks b/c of medical things, but I'll be getting back to that too. It was going fairly well. Progress was slow, but there was progress none-the-less. :)
Had to have some swallowing tests, and EGD, and some other test...so, we already knew that the muscles of my esophagus had been affected and were causing swallowing difficulty. But, I'm also experiencing some severe reflux. So, now I have ulcers on my esophagus and they need to heal. And, something about my food is not digesting, so it's sitting in my stomach...I guess that is causing the reflux? who knows. But, I have a couple of new medications and need to make some diet changes. But, the list of things to eat, I normally eat anyway, so that shouldn't be too difficult. We shall see.
Then, the next step...we're going to try going longer between IVIg infusions. I'm a bit worried about it just b/c I have the attitude of "don't fix something that isn't broken"...I mean, it's working, why mess with it? But, I know that insurance isn't going to keep paying for it without proof that I still need it and the only proof that they will accept is tapering me off and seeing if I become worse. So, we shall see.
I've not been able to make it to the gym much in the last two weeks b/c of medical things, but I'll be getting back to that too. It was going fairly well. Progress was slow, but there was progress none-the-less. :)
Had to have some swallowing tests, and EGD, and some other test...so, we already knew that the muscles of my esophagus had been affected and were causing swallowing difficulty. But, I'm also experiencing some severe reflux. So, now I have ulcers on my esophagus and they need to heal. And, something about my food is not digesting, so it's sitting in my stomach...I guess that is causing the reflux? who knows. But, I have a couple of new medications and need to make some diet changes. But, the list of things to eat, I normally eat anyway, so that shouldn't be too difficult. We shall see.
Friday, May 13, 2011
Yet another day with Polymyositis
I've been poked and prodded by doctors more than I care to think about in the last 2 1/2 weeks. I'm quite tired of doctors right now. Yet, I still have my IVIg treatment on Monday and Tuesday next week.
Had some minor surgery about 1 1/2 weeks ago. That went really well. Then had an EGD on Wednesday of this week. Evidently I have ulcers on my esophagus, caused by reflux. Reflux could be caused by all the medications I'm taking. who really knows. Today I had to do another test. I'm don't really remember the name of it, but it took about two hours. I'll know the results of that on Monday.
I'm feeling really tired. No energy. Don't really know what to do with myself. I'm bored, but when I get up to do anything, my energy just drains and I hurt.
Blah.
Had some minor surgery about 1 1/2 weeks ago. That went really well. Then had an EGD on Wednesday of this week. Evidently I have ulcers on my esophagus, caused by reflux. Reflux could be caused by all the medications I'm taking. who really knows. Today I had to do another test. I'm don't really remember the name of it, but it took about two hours. I'll know the results of that on Monday.
I'm feeling really tired. No energy. Don't really know what to do with myself. I'm bored, but when I get up to do anything, my energy just drains and I hurt.
Blah.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Back to the Gym
Today I went to the gym. This was the first time since being diagnosed with Polymyositis in 2007.
It kicked my rear end! And, all I did was 20 minutes! First I tried to do the stair elliptical machine...couldn't do that at all. I guess if I can't walk up stairs, I should realize that I can't do this machine! oh well. So, I ended up just using the treadmill for 20 minutes. I walked at about 2 mph only! In 20 minutes I made it 1/2 mile, according to the machine. My legs felt like jelly. I wasn't sure I'd be able to make it to the van afterward.
I've come a long way from when I was first diagnosed. It's taken 3 1/2 years, but I can walk with my cane, can lift things (not everything, but some), etc. But, doing things like going to the gym today is a reminder of how far I have to go...how far from "normal" I really am.
Still, I did 20 minutes at the gym. It's still better than it was a few months ago :)
It kicked my rear end! And, all I did was 20 minutes! First I tried to do the stair elliptical machine...couldn't do that at all. I guess if I can't walk up stairs, I should realize that I can't do this machine! oh well. So, I ended up just using the treadmill for 20 minutes. I walked at about 2 mph only! In 20 minutes I made it 1/2 mile, according to the machine. My legs felt like jelly. I wasn't sure I'd be able to make it to the van afterward.
I've come a long way from when I was first diagnosed. It's taken 3 1/2 years, but I can walk with my cane, can lift things (not everything, but some), etc. But, doing things like going to the gym today is a reminder of how far I have to go...how far from "normal" I really am.
Still, I did 20 minutes at the gym. It's still better than it was a few months ago :)
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